Fri. Oct. 2/09 (con’t) 1500 It was a good morning but as usual I guess it would be to much to ask for for it to last all day as I know that the pain will be coming and here it is (9 ½ out of 10) across the chest and back . At least I had a good few hours this morning. Sat. Oct. 3/09 0530 The Song of the Day is : “Suzanne” by Leonard Cohen , Always a good song to drift through memories with and bask in the unseen power of women. The Quote of The Day is “The Grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, something to love, and something to hope for” . by Allan K. Chalmers Now I just have to try to figure out where happiness lies without any of the “grand essentials”. The cancer and the complications are winning today , to much stuff to keep my mind on today . Still going to try to make it through the day without the painkilers , the painkillers side effects kill. Today is going to be a “Dam the torpedoes and just keep putting one foot in front of the other“ kind of day. My whole body seems to want to shut down . I can sometimes will the symptoms away if they are not to severe or hitting me in different parts all over the body but sometimes the symptoms and the pain just overwhelm and leave me breathless and wracked in pain. My naturopathic remedies now seem to bring on complications also . “19 days” I hope. - How much pain do we endure before we become fearless -Fearless in our hopes -Fearless in our dreams -Fearless of the future -Proud of our history -Unburdened by our needs. azab Gonna try to wrench something positive out of the day. I was hoping that I would have time to write something semi-profound or at least helpful or entertaining and to leave behind a bit of a life history although I am still going to try I am doubtful that I will achieve much more . It has been an extremely long ride so far . Bye.
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